Just the 2nd Choice

You know those random nights when you get “the feels”? You just start to think about a sad memory, then that leads to another memory, then to another, and another and you just end up feeling sad. Tonight is one of those nights for me…

Many times in my life, I’ve felt like the 2nd choice. Note that this post isn’t supposed to call anyone out if you’re someone who happens to know me personally, but this is something I’ve definitely thought about and felt a lot.

I want to know what it feels like to be someone’s 1st choice. I want to be someone’s favorite. Especially in friend groups, you know everyone has their “favorite friend” and usually I’m not anyone’s fave…or at least not that I know of. I’ve been left out many times when plans are made, had no one to sit next to on the bus or in class, and just have been forgotten about or left behind.

I’ve always been the person that thinks they’re bothering someone if they try to talk to them, initiate a conversation, or want to make plans.

I’ve always been the person that just wants everyone to be happy, usually resulting in me sacrificing my own happiness for someone else’s happiness and hiding my feelings.

But you know what…I’ve learned to accept being the 2nd choice if it means just being myself. I am who I am. I may not be someone’s 1st choice now, but I’m an awesome choice! I’ll be who I want to be, and I’ll be the best person I can be. This is what I want to emphasize to anyone who is reading this. Just be the best person you can be.

Also, get rid of toxic friendships and relationships you have with people. They’ll just drain you and they aren’t worth your time!

And if you’re reading this and feel like you’ll always be the 2nd choice like me, don’t worry!! You’ll always be an AWESOME POSSUM (Credit to Rachel Ballinger for coining this term)!

-Christy

 

 

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